Teacher: How many litres of milk a buffallo can give in a week if it gives two litres a day?
Student: Twelve litres, sir.
Teacher: That’s wrong answer. The answer is 14.
Student: But sir, isn’t Sunday a holiday!!
“The man , The Machine, The Software – PeopleSoft VII”
Boy – “I am a PB boy”
Girl – “I am a PB gal”
“Badte bacho ke liye complete software – Powerbuilder”
“Eat bugs, Sleep bugs…..Do only debugs”
Internet Programmer – “I got the ASP power , now u go get it!!!”
“Microsoft office – Nothing official about it !!!”
” Software ki raksha karta hein Norton Anti virus…. Software hai jaha, Norton Antivirus hein vaha…”
Project Manager – I want the code today….
Programmer – 2 minutes
“Programmer ka kaam kare asaan, Duniya bhar me hai iski shaan…VB….VB…..VB”
Roy: After my death, I will donate my brain so that it will help the research work of scientists.
Ron: Oh yes, now-a-days many researches are going on about ‘ vacant space’!
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Roy: I never run away from any responsibilities!
Ron: Its because you are always kicked out much before!
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John, two days before his scheduled visit to the proctologist, accidentally swallowed his glass eye when he was cleaning it. He was worried at first, but after calling his doctor and learning he probably won’t get sick, he ordered another and soon forgot about it.
He arrived for his annual proctology exam on time, and was soon called into the doctor’s examining room. After undressing, John follows his instructions and bends over. The first thing the proctologist saw when he took a peek up the man’s butt was his glass eye staring right back at him!
In the early 1930’s, a farmer and his wife went to a fair. The farmer was fascinated by the airplanes and asked a pilot how much a ride would cost.
“$10 for 3 minutes,” replied the pilot. “That’s too much,” said the farmer.
The pilot thought for a second and then said, “I’ll make you a deal. If you and your wife ride for 3 minutes without uttering a sound, the ride will be free. But if you make a sound, you’ll have to pay $10.”
A man was celebrating his 100th birthday and everybody complimented him on how athletic and well-preserved he appeared.
“Gentlemen, I will tell you the secret of my success,” he cackled. “I have been in the open air day after day for some 75 years now.”
The celebrants were impressed and asked how he managed to keep up his rigorous fitness regime.
“Well, you see my wife and I were married 75 years ago. On our wedding night, we made a solemn pledge. Whenever we had a fight, the one who was proved wrong would go outside and take a walk.”