Sardar Jokes SMS
A Teacher lecturing on population - In India after
Every 10 sec a woman gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up- we must find & stop her!.
Sardar-why r all these people running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup, why r others running?
Teacher: "I killed a person" convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is "u will go to jail".
Sardarji was filling up application form for a job. He was not sure as to what to be filled in column "Salary
Expected".
After much thought he wrote: Yes!
Sardar told his servant: Go and water the plants. Servant it’s already raining. Sardar: So what? Take an umbrella and go.
Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket. Dealer gave 11cr after deducting tax. Angry Sardar: "Give me 20 cr or else
return my 20 Rs back.
Postman:- I Have To Come 5 Miles To Deliver U This Packet
Sardar:- why did u come so far. Instead u could have posted it....
Sardar's wish :when i die,i wana die like my grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not screaming like all the
passengers in the car he was driving..
Sardar at an Art Gallery: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!
Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked:" Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: "I'm writing to my 6 yr old son, he can't read very fast.
Flash news: A 2 seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab .Local sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still
digging for more..
A man asked sardarji, why Manmohan singh goes walking at evening not in the morning. Sardarji replied "Arey bhai Manmohan is PM
not AM".
Sardar comes back 2 his car & finds a note saying "Parking Fine"
How do you recognize a Sardar in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.
once a Sardhar was walking and had a glove on one hand and not on other so the man asked him why did he do so. He
Replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold
and on the other hand it would be hot.
Sardarji bought a brand new Maruti and decided to drive down from Amritsar, where he lived, to Jalandar to meet his friend.
He reached there in a few hours.
After spending a few days there, he decided to return, and called up his mother to expect him in the evening. But he didn't reach
in the evening and not the next day either. "
When he finally reached home on the third day, his distraught mother ran and asked him " Arre Puttar, ki hoya?
(What Happened, My Son?)
The Sardarji got out, obviously very tired from a long journey,
and said, "Oy, ye Marutti wale pagal hain, agge jaane waaste
chaar gear banaate hain, )
aur pichche jaane waaste sirf ik?" (These Maruti Car people are crazy! They have four gears for going forward, but only one for
going back!
Santa Singh decided to start a chicken farm so he bought a hundred chickens to begin with. A month later he returned to
the dealer for another hundred chickens . because all of the first lot had died. A month later he was back
at t he dealer for another hundred chickens for the second lot had also died
'But I think I know where I'm going wrong,' said Santa, 'I think
I'm planting them too deep.'
Sardar to Shopkeeper: - Mujhe India Ka Flag Dikhao,
Shopkeeper ne Flag Dikhaya, Sardar: - Isme aur Colour Dikhao.
Sardar: O Banno Car ki speed itani ky badha di..? biwi: Oji Car ki break
fail ho gayi hai, Exident ho jaye iske pahale ghar pahunch jaate hai.
Sardar : Sitting on The Top of the Mountain and Studying....
When a Person asked what he was doing.... He replied... Oye!! Higher
Studies Yaar...!!!
Do sardar jee motor cycle per bomb lay kar jarahay thay,
Rastay main speed breaker ki waja say jhatkay lag rahay thay,
Sardar jee ka dost bola yaar aaram say gari chalao kahi bomb na phatjain,
Sardar jee...Oo tussi fiker hi naker assi kay pass dosra bhi tu bomb hay. :)
Santa Singh goes to a TV shop and asks, 'Aap ke paas color TV hai kya?'
'Haan' replies shopowner. Santa Singh says, 'Ek hara vala dena!'
A sardar calls another sardar on the phone & says "Hi, Main Bol Raha
Hoon".
The other sardar replies "Kamaal Hain,Ithe bhi Main Bol Raha Hoon!"
Sardar : Apne bete se bola, Bevakuf...kaisa machis leke aaya hai, ek
bhi tili nahin jalti.
Beta : Kya baat karte ho papa, sab tili test karke laya hu.
Doctor : App ka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai?
Sardaar : Hoga, Jarur hoga; 25 saalse mera khoon jo pee rahi hai....
Nurse - "Mubarak ho.. Sardarji.. aap papa ban gaye.."
Sardarji - " Meri wife ko nahi bolna.. main usey SURPRISE doonga..!"
Sardarji is in Delhi. He is walking on a street which has Clock Tower
when someone asks him if he wants to buy the clock on the Tower. Sardarji says "Yes".
"Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder." The man took the thousand and disappeared. Having waited for several hours the
Sardarji figured he was taken for a ride. On the next day the Sardarji is again
walking along the same street and the same man asks him to buy the clock. "Give me a thousand rupees and I'll go get a ladder."
The Sardarji gives him the thousand and says "I am not a fool.This time, you wait and I'll go get a ladder."
Sardarji opens his lunch box in the middle of the road....why ?
Just to confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office
What is the full form of singh: S-sardar I-insaan N-nahi G- gadha H-hai.
Angry sardar-Oye mein is duniya ko mita dunga - mita dunga- mita dunga.
Another sardar standing besides said mein tujhe rubber nahi dunga.
Santa singh: Can u spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it?
Banta singh: Post office.
Sardar on cycle hit lady accidentally, lady says," break nahi mar sakta tha kya?
Sardar replies "break ka kya hai, poori cycle to mar di....."
Sardar:Aap kitna padhe ho?
Friend: B.A.
Sardar: kamal karte ho yaar sirf do word padhe aur woh bhi ulte.
Sardar: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunaideti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt.
One day sardarji was sitting in his office on the thirteenth floor of a
building when a man came running in to his office and shouted "Santa singh
your daughter Preeto just died in an accident" ....... since Sardarji was in panic.
Not knowing what to do he jumped from his office window while coming down when he was near the
tenth floor he remembered he didn't have a daughter named Preeto.
when he was near the fifth floor he remembered he was not married.
126 Once a Sardar ji rescued 6 people from a house burning on fire;
But still the Sardar ji was jailed, why?
Because all the rescued persons were fire fighters
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jokes